The Meaning of Life

~"Boop," Alanis Morissette in the movie, "Dogma."

~"42," Douglas Adams, "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy."

I used to be one of those people who thought it was hideously selfish to bring children into such a cruel, uncaring, burning world. If I am being honest, I still do. It's a conflicting emotion I wrestle with almost daily.

How to raise your kids to thrive in times like these? I won't pretend I have the answer to that. There's lots of good books on the subject though.

Then one day, kids seemed like the thing to do... So... I'll spare you the details on that and tell you that my co-parent and I happily got pregnant and I gave birth to twins. Not just any two humans. The humans who would change nearly everything about who I thought I was.

Yes, the world is full of sh*t and sh*its sometimes. There are a lot of things that make my nose hairs curl up and tell my brain to hide under the covers and never come out.

My favorite quote on the subject, my antidote to this pessimism:

"Don't apologize for raising dragon slayers when there are actual f*cking dragons in the world."

I don't know who said it, if you do, please tell me.

The Meaning of Life...

The first time I held my daughters, everything stopped. All the thoughts that normally argue for space in my brain went silent. I felt like I was floating somewhere I had never been; the safest, calmest, most peaceful place in the universe while simultaneously looking at the most beautiful thing my eyes had ever seen.

Watching my children learn and grow is the most all-encompassing and mesmerizing experience. Their ability to thrive, adapt, learn, and persevere through all the trials and tribulations of making their tiny body move, learning to walk, falling, and endlessly getting back up to try again... If that's not the most inspirational metaphor for getting your life where you want it to be, I don't know what is.

Children question everything. Most amazingly, the questions about life as we know it don't come out of their mouths much later than when they learn to speak. They are naturally curious. With all their questions, and oh so many answers I didn't have... They taught me far more than I've ever taught them as we discovered the answers together.

Children will slow you down. They are natural helpers and will want to do everything you do, with you. In that slowing down, I get to see tiny hands discovering how to do new things. I notice details I was moving too quickly to notice before. I have to stretch my brain to find an explanation for why the things I'm teaching them work as they do. I cultivate my patience by reminding myself I get to embrace these moments with full mindfulness. These moments are everything.

Want to live life to the fullest? Go for a simple walk with a small child. You will see the world all over again as if it is brand new and full of excitement (because it actually is, every moment of every day).

Every rock, every tree, every leaf, every puddle, the grains of sand, the bugs, each flower and all its petals, the grass, the hills, the clouds, the rain, the sun, the stars... The wonder of the ordinary, incredible universe that we adults so often take for granted or are "too busy" to notice, is thrust into the center stage and a child will make sure you take it in, even if that means the rock is pushed one inch from your nose so it is impossible not to acknowledge.

Before this, before kids, I for one did not give the universe its due credit. I marveled at it from time to time, but not like this. I'm not saying you need to have kids to embrace life to the fullest and give life meaning. I am saying that my kids showed me what it means to really live. Children intrinsically understand the meaning of life.